How Our PM destroyed Balakot

When the wise Prime Minister walked in promenading his 56 inches covered in a grey suit that had its warp,, the Air Chief, Vice Chief, AOC-in-C WAir Command, and the pick of the best pilots stood up. The PM had previously instructed that nobody should touch his feet. For that reason alone, they saluted.

So kya hum theyyar hai?” Are we ready? Asked the PM, raising the tail of his glimmering jacket and sitting down on the seat of his pants..

The Air chief cringed. “Mananiy Pradhann Mantriji, our Anna data, (honourable Prime Minister, our food giver), we are ready, but…”

“But what?” asked the Prime Minister, his voice fraught with customary impatience.

The weather report is not good. One or two  cirrus clouds in the sky,” interjected  theAir Officer in command of Western Air Command with 35 years of flying 17 types of aircraft under the golden laurels of his peak cap which he set aside after the salute.. ’You see, sir, we pilots are not used to flying when there are clouds in the sky, especially those thin, wispy, high-altitude Cirrus clouds

The Prime Minister thought for a moment.

Bewkoofo,” (you idiots,) he said, ‘Why don’t you use your brains? You should drink cow urine every morning and do yoga like me.  Don’t you see, Cirrus or whatever shubhnam (good name)you call it, that bad weather means more clouds in the sky, so nobody will see you? Fly above the clouds, go bomb and come back, baas.” That’s all.

The Air Chief to the last Flying Officer looked at each other as if asking why in all their 5000 to 8000 flying hours and fighting experience in at least 3 wars,  this magnificent idea had not occurred to them. Whoever heard of something stupid like a radar seeing through clouds?

Only one man, a young  flight lieutenant with a tiny Cat-A golden wing pinned to his chest pocket below the crocheted large wings above it, spoke up.

“Pradhamantri Mahoday, we’re not flying Zeppelins and they won’t be shooting catapults,..”

Then fly Jeppelins, Their catapults won’t see you through the clouds,” thundered the Prime Minister.

That’s how Balakot was bombed and the entire lot of terrorists in Pakistan was  wiped out in one go. Period.

In every flying squadron in the IAF, they say that you can see these words engraved in gold with a huge photo of our beloved Prime Minister hung up on the walls of their Ops Rooms: “

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